Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Shit hath hiteth the fan

When shit happens to me I generally try to laugh about it. Make fun of the situation. It’s what fuels most of my posts. But today I am at a loss for finding the humour in the chaos. Day three of 2012 and shit hiteth the fan.

I received the most hideous messages from a family member to the point where I feel attacked and I will most likely never speak to them again. I cried and cried and cried until my eyeballs felt like they were going to shrivel up and my brain was going to implode. I spent the evening popping myprodols and thinking about how I would gladly welcome the end of the world and devising an escape plan to Bali.  End of story … or so I thought.

Day 4 of 2012 and as you know I am working in this shiteous small office as a favour to my father during the holidays. Since I am freelancing I am taking any kind of work I can get in order to afford to feed oneself and pay one’s rent. Only to be informed five days away from being paid that in fact the manager of the business doesn’t feel it is necessary to pay me double (for manning the office and doing the daily marketing, which I do freelance for them on the side). Cue vomit. Cue imagining becoming a bergie, blind rage and a lots of fuck motherfuckers.

I am so befuck about this bullshit right now. I didn’t plan for 2012 to screw me up the arsehole this early in the year. (Apologies to anyone who reads this that can’t handle swearing etc – you shouldn’t be reading this blog anyway).

Plan for 2012 was as so;

·        Monetize blog (I can’t do this for free forever).

·        Add new pages to blog to showcase writing skills not just rant posts.

·        Stop smoking. (I bought a pack of ciggies on the 2nd of Jan. Fail)

·        Be more adventurous.

·        Make some money from being an honest and funny writer.

·        Lose a million kilos.

·        And a few other useless/personal/never going to happen things.

I’m going to fuck shit up if I don’t get my money. I am sick of getting screwed around by naaiers who just want money, money, money and want you to work for free. My pen is as sharp as my tongue. I am the wrong bitch to fuck with. You have been warned and you know who you are.

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